For Some, Holidays Suck!

Good morning ladies,

The holidays are meant to be filled with wonderful family get togethers and gifts of love and generosity but not everyone is in that boat. So many dread the holidays for various reasons; no family around, no family period, family that doesn’t get along. Even when we do not get along we feel forced to get together because it’s “TRADITION”. Movies are made about how much trauma it can be to go to be with family that isn’t healthy for them.

Did you know that drinking alcohol rises during the holidays and not just because of great cheer and laughter? It also rises because so many have to drink their way through the season because they are so sad they are alone, or because they would rather be.

We say to one another, Happy Holiday’s, are you going to spend time with your family? Happy Holiday’s, cheers. It is socially not acceptable to say, I hate the holidays. I hate that I don’t have a close enough family that I even want to see them. I wonder what the response would be, probably pity, discomfort, quiet….

We spend so much of our life lying to be in the socially acceptable place. What if we were truly honest? What if when we received the invitation to go to a holiday get together that brings us so much anxiety that we have cramps, cold sweats and nightmares we said no, I’m not going? What if when someone asked what we were doing for the holiday’s we said, staying home alone because I don’t get the invitation to celebrate with my family?

This message I know is a downer but sometimes life is a downer. When you are in this boat the upcoming month or more is filled with depression, anxiety.

Please be extra generous with YOUR love this year. Extend the invitation to those alone but don’t be offended if they say no. A friend of mine recently told me that she and her children are often asked to go to a friends for the holidays but “it is so uncomfortable sitting around a table with someone else’s family, we just don’t fit”.

I don’t know what the solution is or if there is one other than accepting others honesty about this subject and not expecting a lie. Let us all accept each other’s honesty without judgment or the look of pity. Acknowledge that no everyone has the cookie cutter family and those that don’t feel extra stress this time of year. Be honest about your own holiday anxieties, don’t feel you have to pretend.

Closing this is kind of a bitch…no happy spin coming to mind.

Here we go, if you’re in this boat I was speaking of take out all that irritation in a kick boxing class, go for a long run, take a calming yoga class…physical activity has a way of making us feel better. If you have to exercise 6hrs out of each day, that’s all good. You certainly won’t gain those few extra holiday pounds. You’ll go into the New Year looking a little firmer, that’s never a bad thing!!!

Many Happenings going on tomorrow, I am not going to list all of them but I will tell you what I and my family are doing. Going to the YMCA of Greater Kalamazoo for the FOR FREE TURKEY TROT or WALK. This is Thanksgiving morning at 9am. Come join me and earn a piece of pie!!!

Now, go Get Your Sweat On!

Your Turn

Mel

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